Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
