oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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