I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
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