she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize