Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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