Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
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He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
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someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
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