idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
