Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
