Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
