he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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