is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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