Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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