I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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