I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
