Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
We don't watch enough power rangers
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize