I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
