We're facebook friends in real life
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize