She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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