fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
