I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.