no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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