I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
