I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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