This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
