I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize
