just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
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i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
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all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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