We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize