Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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