yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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