i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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