That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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