I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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