and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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