I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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