I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize