I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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