She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
