I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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