If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I'm really busy with my period
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