So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
