i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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