It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize