So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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