is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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