So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
people are starting to question the shark bite story
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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