You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
