you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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