Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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