I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Randomize
