$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
